There’s a First Time for Everything!

Last night I ate bull penis. Yeah, that’s right, you read correctly; last night I ate a bull’s penis! I’m not saying I’m Andrew Zimmern or Anthony Bourdain and I go around eating the craziest food I can get my hands on just for the sheer shock value, but I’d like to try everything at least once. My philosophy on being a cook is, and has always been: you are doing yourself a disservice as a chef if you are unwilling to find out how certain foods taste. To that end, I’ve eaten Alligator, Rabbit, Elk, Venison, Squab (which is basically a small pigeon), Ants, Crickets, Grasshoppers, Lobster tomalley, Fish Heads (eyes and all), Ox Tail, Pig’s Feet, and probably a whole host of things I can’t remember right now. So when I walked into the restaurant last night and looked that the menu, I knew I’d kick myself if I walked out of there without trying the bull penis.
It took about 30 minutes for my bull penis to arrive, and when my waitress set it in front of me I started to have second thoughts. It’s pretty easy to think you’re s tough guy when you order penis off the menu, it’s another thing when they actually set that penis in front of you, with nary a knife or fork in sight.
I picked it up, stared down the urethra, and took a bite. For those of you who have never eaten another animals’ penis, I can honestly say it is unlike anything you, or I for that matter, have ever tasted before. The only way I can describe it is like trying to chew a large mouthful of unflavored Laffy Taffy with soft pebbles in it that has been soaked in beef stock. In more plain terms, you can chew and chew and chew and what is in your mouth simply refuses to be broken down; which leads to another problem when it comes to trying to swallow. I don’t know about you, but I’ve got a gag reflex and having what amounts to a Super Bouncy Ball at the back of my throat kinda put a damper on ingestion.
That said, if you ever get the chance, I highly recommend trying bull penis.
And yes (Megan), I recognize that this makes two phallic related posts in a row…just the way the cookie, or in this case penis, crumbles.