Yankee Stadium…Tastiness?

I love going to Yankee games. I especially like getting free tickets to Yankee games. But I feel like every time someone gives me a ticket to a game what they’re really giving me is a bill for about $50 bucks. The reason behind this is that once I’m at the Stadium, I’m a sucker for a fat guy in a blue polo shirt toting a bag full of beer. Not to mention, what would an ice cold beer at the ballpark be without a hot dog (and a couple more beers) to go with it? Since the beginning of this new season I’ve had the opportunity to go to two Yankee games and have started to eat my way around the Stadium. I also figured that with all the options available, I’d be doing myself a disservice if I simply settled on a hot dog (which are Nathan’s now) and a Pepsi (no longer Coke). Speaking of the changes, I got into it with one of the vendors on my second trip when he tried to tell me that they’ve “always” had Pepsi at Yankee Stadium. To which I responded, “no, not this brand new stadium, the old one.”

Anyway, on my first visit, I made my way down to the area behind home plate and watched one of the butchers from Lobel’s slice up from flank steak. Actually, I bought a beer from one of the beer men, then tried to find my seat…then went to Lobel’s, beer still in hand. I handed a Twenty to the cashier, waited for my five dollars change, and watched a man I will call a demi-butcher, slice prime rib and place the slices into a jus. My eyes grew wide as I watched him slice and then I must’ve forgotten where I was for a moment; because I asked him, “could you cut me some pieces from the end please?” Then I turned to the guys behind me and said, “fat is flavour.” The demi-butcher looked at me like he was dismissing a crack addict who’s stumbled into a vegan restaurant asking for a ham sandwich, and said, “yeah, they’re in there.”
Despite his lies, the woman assembling the sandwiches was very nice and hooked me up with some extra meat. I hightailed it back to my seat; just in time to see Joba serve up a tater ball which sailed past me and into right field; sat down and dug in. Imagine my surprise when my first bite of this sandwich I’d heard so much about was rather dry. And I was further surprised when I opened the two little condiment containers and found horseradish in one, and chopped olives in the other…can a brother get some spicy mustard? Damn! I ate my dry sandwich anyway, dumping the olives and horseradish on it so it could taste like something. I wasn’t particularly happy but in all likelihood I’d order it again.

My second trip to 161st Street and River Ave, I wised up. I’d seen the long lines for the Carl’s Steaks stand on the main level and decided that my belly was already full of Lobel’s beef and I wasn’t going to drop $11 bucks on a cheesesteak I knew wasn’t going to be as good as Philly. Wait, did I say “wised up”? I meant drank more. Because I realized you can buy souvenir cups that hold 24 ounces for $10 bucks at the concessions, as opposed to 16 ounce beers in the stands for $9, I happily shelled out the extra buck for 8 extra ounces of lukewarm liquid gold. Perhaps my judgment was a bit impaired, but I got my wander on and found another Carl’s Steaks on the third level, this one with a much shorter line. I ordered my steak the only way anyone who’s ever been to Philly orders a steak: Whiz-wit (Cheez Whiz and sautéed onions), but sadly they were out of onions. Still, I settled back into my seat and enjoyed some artificial cheese soaked goodness. At $10.75, a cheesesteak from Carl’s might give you the most bang for your buck. The next time I come to the stadium, I’m going to find the Boar’s Head Deli people are raving about and spend $12 bucks on a sandwich I could get for half that two blocks from the stadium.
All in all, the new Yankee Stadium might get its ass kicked by the old Stadium when it comes to character, but the new one’s got a leg up when it comes to food…but you still won’t catch me eating any sushi there!


Next time, I sacrifice four jalapenos and some horseradish to the vodka gods…