Those of you that know me, or maybe I should say those of you that knew me, know that I am a fan of vodka. In college, I used to pray to the vodka gods; but that usually left me praying to the porcelain god later, so I put a stop to that. Even though I’ve curtailed my vodka intake, I’m still fascinated by flavoured vodka. Not Absolut Apeach or Stoli Blueberi, but slowly infusing the flavours of real fruits and vegetables and spices into vodka create something entirely different. A few years ago, I made Apple-Cinnamon vodka during the cold Winter months and thought it would be a great sipping drink, or something you could use like Spiced Rum. I didn’t know what I was doing and the Cinnamon sticks turned my vodka a deep red colour and made it pretty damn spicy. Tasty too, but spicy.
Well, last weekend I was out with a lady friend of mine when the mood for Bloody Mary’s struck us. Seeing as procrastination was the Secret Word of the Day, it took us a while to reach cruising altitude and by the time we went in search of a liquor store able to supply us with vodka for some Bloody merry Mary making we were out of luck. Strolling down the street, we happened upon a bar, walked in and inquired as to the Bloody Mary situation…they had them. The bartender was training and the tomato juice in the bars lowboy (it’s the refrigerator near the bartenders feet) resembled Campbell’s Think-n-Chunky, so she had to go run to the kitchen to get more. Then she had to learn how to make a Bloody Mary (I know). The she had to find a spoon to add the bottled horseradish. The she had to figure out how many dashes of Tabasco did they get, “was it three or was it six?” Then she had to let our drinks sit under the Guinness tap for another minute while she confirmed that she should add a hint of Guinness to the Bloody Mary (“I asked you to give me a refreshing drink…you could fall in love with an Orangutan in that!”), which she was in fact supposed to add. We finally got our drinks; which the girl, who had been working at the bar about an hour longer than we’d been inside it, had already proclaimed to be very good; so apparently there was little reason for us to confirm that fact?!?!? We toasted and sipped. My first thought, as a half-dozen little pieces of minced bottled horseradish shot up my straw and into my mouth, was there’s got to be an easier way.
We left the bar and by this point, my wheels which had been turning were starting to burn rubber. My thinking was: instead of adding Tabasco and grated horseradish root to a Bloody Mary, couldn’t you just infuse the essence of those things into vodka? Granted, it would be a more time consuming process, but wouldn’t the end product be better? And if you know anything about me, you know I’m the king of the time consuming process. Why roast the pork butt for five hours when we can slow roast it for twelve…? I just think some things taste better with time and care.
The next morning, I woke up and went to my local liquor store. Incidentally, I’m sure I’m just the kind of guy they want in there, first thing in the morning…unshaven, hair a mess and inquiring as to the price of vodka. With my vodka in hand and a shify parting look from the guy behind the counter, I went to the food co-op and bought four of the fattest, Camryn Manheim off-the-wagon, Mexican jalapeno peppers I could find and went back home grinning like a mad scientist. Then I went about the rest of my day before finally coming back home with some horseradish root in hand. Working quickly, I washed and halved the jalapenos and cut a five inch section of horseradish from the root. Then I peeled it and sliced it into quarter-inch pieces. I dropped everything in the large glass pickling/infusing jar I have and poured the bottle of vodka over the top. I sealed the lid and went to bed.
Over the course of the next couple days, I kept half an eye on the jar and the colour of the vodka; which remained fairly clear…up until day four, when my vodka began to take on a greenish tint. Then on Saturday morning, I tasted and strained my vodka. The initial punch from the jalapeno, or what I thought was jalapeno, was quite startling; but I felt the flavours to still be not quite complex enough and decided to add more horseradish and let it infuse some more. I saved my jalapeno halves, put the old horseradish, as well as another six fresh slices in the jar and topped it once again with vodka. By the time Tuesday rolled around, it was ready. The vodka has a spicy quality from it that, in my estimation, is more from the horseradish, than the jalapeno. But that doesn’t mean it isn’t spicy, it just means there are two distinct kicks and I see how someone could just taste spice and declare the vodka undrinkable. So what now, you ask? Now I put my plan into action: making Bloody Mary’s, hoping that all I need to add to my drink (besides the tomato juice) will be some Lime Juice, Worcestershire Sauce and some Celery Salt.
Next time, Part Two.
Update (8/20/09):
Thanks to the Infusions of Grandeur guys for help with the vodka.
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